When I began this blog a couple of months ago I didn’t intend for so much of it to be about football, but since England have gone deep into the World Cup it’s been impossible to ignore.
Our quarter final match against Norway had a much friendlier kick-off time. Pre-child, I used to spend non-work nights drinking Tesco own brand energy drinks watching films and playing on Football Manager into the small hours, so yes, staying up late on a Saturday night was (and still is) child’s play for me!
Sadly, swallowing pills isn’t. I’ve always struggled on that score. At full time, I decided to use the pause in play before extra time began to take a couple of vitamin supplements. The first one went down fine (as it usually does) but it’s the second one that always gives me grief, and this one nearly ended me.
Well, it didn’t. But my god, did it wedge itself! I retched a few times as it tried to decide whether it wanted to go up or down. My wife, being as sharp as she is, immediately knew what to do and offered me advice — in this case, it was to eat some bread. So, while the England match (and my life) hung in the balance, I chewed down a slice of white bread, even though I wasn’t hungry for it. Now that’s the sort of length I’ll go to, to make sure I stay alive!
It was hard to concentrate on the football when I was focusing on my breathing and swallowing. The pill must have slid past the sticking point, or dissolved, eventually, but it left its mark (a sensation that made it feel like it was basically still there). When it comes to high-pressure sporting occasions, I’ve always taken the term ‘chokers’ to be figurative, but in my case it was very literal. But hey, I survived! And so you get to read this, you lucky thing.
I thought Norway played well and I don’t mind admitting we probably benefitted from some strokes of fortune (that said, I thought our penalty should’ve stood), so that must have been a bitter pill for Norway to swallow, or choke on.